Feeling lonely? You’re not alone.
Written by Judy Hyojoo Rhee
Have you ever felt a pang of emptiness and isolation — loneliness? Perhaps it was that time you were sitting in a bus, and all the other passengers were scrolling through their phones. Perhaps it was when you were studying alone at home, and you looked up, only to hear the clock ticking against the quiet of your room. Or it may even have been at a party, when you were surrounded by people you knew but whom you did not feel an emotional connection to.
Image source: Juric, Sam. “The Science of Loneliness.” The Walrus, 11 Nov. 2019, thewalrus.ca/the-science-of-loneliness/.
|
Vivek Murthy, the former surgeon-general of the United States, calls loneliness a “modern epidemic”. According to the Globe and Mail, one in five Canadians are chronically lonely. But what exactly is loneliness?
Loneliness is perceived social isolation; we feel lonely when what we experience in our relationships fail to match our expectations. As Professor John Cacioppo of the University of Chicago writes, loneliness is an “evolutionary mechanism”. Thousands of years ago, humans formed tribes, which were key for both protection from predators and for obtaining food. Being isolated was not unpleasant — it was dangerous. Our bodies created a defense mechanism; if we found ourselves separated from our tribes for extended periods of time, our brains were to send us a signal. This signal, loneliness, would encourage us to return to our tribe. Like thirst or hunger, loneliness is a biological response. While loneliness itself is beneficial, prolonged loneliness, similar to prolonged hunger or thirst, has devastating consequences for our health. |
A study conducted by the Brigham Young University found that chronic loneliness has the same impact on one’s body as smoking 15 cigarettes every day. Loneliness increases our vulnerability to illnesses such as cancer and Alzheimer’s disease. It also breeds psychiatric and behavioural disorders, ranging from depression and personality disorders to drug abuse.
The causes of this epidemic are varied. Our society’s embrace of individualism has meant more of us are living alone. Millennials are spending less time socializing with their peers, instead prioritizing interviews, jobs, and the idea of ‘success’. Increased reliance on technology for communication has hindered our ability to convey and receive the nuances of our words, which are essential ingredients for true companionship.
At its core, the loneliness epidemic stems from a shortage of meaningful human interactions. While these interactions will not be achieved overnight, there are steps we can take to address this issue. On an individual level, we can focus on strengthening existing relationships, which could take the form of calling a relative or friend we haven’t spoken to in a while. But the scale of this epidemic requires our society to make a collective effort. Governments must fund and provide resources for community-based initiatives, such as co-housing projects or programs that promote intergenerational relationships. Schools must teach students about loneliness and the importance of emotional well-being.
This winter, when we reunite with family and friends for the holidays, each of us can initiate face-to-face conversations and engage in them with purpose — this action alone will help us meet our social needs. It must be remembered that the antidote to loneliness is human beings. A solution does not need to be devised; we ourselves are the solution to this epidemic.
*This article is based on a speech presented by the writer at the Canadian Senior High Speech Nationals (Nov. 2019).
The causes of this epidemic are varied. Our society’s embrace of individualism has meant more of us are living alone. Millennials are spending less time socializing with their peers, instead prioritizing interviews, jobs, and the idea of ‘success’. Increased reliance on technology for communication has hindered our ability to convey and receive the nuances of our words, which are essential ingredients for true companionship.
At its core, the loneliness epidemic stems from a shortage of meaningful human interactions. While these interactions will not be achieved overnight, there are steps we can take to address this issue. On an individual level, we can focus on strengthening existing relationships, which could take the form of calling a relative or friend we haven’t spoken to in a while. But the scale of this epidemic requires our society to make a collective effort. Governments must fund and provide resources for community-based initiatives, such as co-housing projects or programs that promote intergenerational relationships. Schools must teach students about loneliness and the importance of emotional well-being.
This winter, when we reunite with family and friends for the holidays, each of us can initiate face-to-face conversations and engage in them with purpose — this action alone will help us meet our social needs. It must be remembered that the antidote to loneliness is human beings. A solution does not need to be devised; we ourselves are the solution to this epidemic.
*This article is based on a speech presented by the writer at the Canadian Senior High Speech Nationals (Nov. 2019).