Failure? That’s OK, Here’s How to Deal With It
Written by Jessica Song
Everyone fails — it’s an evitability of life. Whether it’s school, a sport, or a competition, we’ve all failed before, and that’s just completely natural. If you’re going through a failure right now, understand that it will be okay. If you aren’t, keep this article in mind to help you in the future. What matters is not how we fail, but rather how we deal with it:
Image source: Hoon, Michael. “Facing Failure: How to Overcome and Find Success Again.” TheJobNetwork, 17 Apr. 2019, www.thejobnetwork.com/facing-failure-finding-success/.
- Accept the failure. No amount of denial will change anything now. In order to learn from the failure and ultimately grow as a person, acceptance is the foundation upon which everything is built. Begin by taking some time to reflect and come to terms with this failure - only then can we learn to improve.
- There is one key thing to keep in mind here: do not confuse identity with occurrence. Getting a C in math doesn’t mean you’re incapable of doing math. Missing a goal doesn’t mean you’re an incompetent athlete. Failing does not make you a failure.
- Assess the failure. The best thing about encountering failure is that it provides incentive for us to improve. After all, when the sailing is smooth, we don’t want to change anything — that takes too much effort. However, a failure will drive us to make necessary changes in order to avoid repeating the same mistake. After you’ve accepted the failure, examine your systems; adjust what isn’t working for you, and find ways to make your strategies more effective.
- Implement new strategies. Here is where you draw upon what you’ve learned from the failure and use that newfound wisdom to improve yourself. Implement the changes you want to make into a structured system that will facilitate the outcomes you desire. If staying on top of your revised strategies feels overwhelming, remember that your brain isn’t the only tool that’s available — use methods of accountability like a schedule, calendar, or to-do list to keep you motivated.
- Act and build momentum! Now that you know what to do, all that’s left is acting upon it. Starting is the hardest part — inactivity can lead to a deadly downward spiral. So, if you don’t feel like getting started, start anyway. Remember, motivation doesn’t have to precede action. In fact, forcing yourself to act will actually bolster your motivation, which leads to more action. Despite emotional fluctuations or other obstacles, building up momentum day by day will become a self-fulfilling prophecy of your success.
Remember, “success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” — Winston Churchill
Failure is not detrimental to success, but actually quintessential. Understanding how to learn from your failures only brings you one step closer to success. Good luck everybody! You got this.
Failure is not detrimental to success, but actually quintessential. Understanding how to learn from your failures only brings you one step closer to success. Good luck everybody! You got this.
works cited
- “To Be Successful, Accept the Possibility of Failure.” The Globe and Mail, 13 Apr. 2017, www.theglobeandmail.com/report-on-business/careers/leadership-lab/to-be-successful-accept-the-possibility-of-failure/article33887070/.
- “Teaching Children Why Failure MUST Be an Option.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-helm/201806/teaching-children-why-failure-must-be-option.
- “Why Accepting Failure Is Necessary.” TechWell, www.techwell.com/techwell-insights/2013/09/why-accepting-failure-necessary.